Sunday, August 26, 2012

On Children and Pamphlets

After several years of motherhood, we're used to being prepared for certain situations.  Lately, we've got you covered in ways one would never have guessed.

That's right, if you've been dying to work at the Gap, boy do we have the application for you.  Find yourself wanting nutrition information on Starbucks beyond just the calories they post? Look no further than our kitchen.  Feel like making a big donation to a synagogue, even if you may not be Jewish?  Oh, do we have the pamphlet for you, peeps.

We've got pamphlets upon pamphlets upon pamphlets.  Political pamphlets, pamphlets to help you talk about your grief, pamphlets to help you part with your money, and even pamphlets in Spanish.

Why, you ask?

Because, apparently, children go through phases and we are now in the little-documented "pamphlet phase".  After digging out of a sea of paper we set out to find out more information about this odd phase, seeing as how we can't possibly be the only parent going through this.  After finding little information online about sating your child's appetite for collecting random pamphlets, we thought we'd share for the benefit of others.

What are the signs that we're in a full-fledged pamphlet phase? Mini's face lights up whenever she finds a pamphlet.  In waiting rooms she happily walks around hoarding them, making sure she has one of everything.  Rather than avoiding those people on the street handing out paper, she flocks to them, grinning from ear to ear after she sees just how many pamphlets they have to offer.  And lest you mistakenly think she is not aware of what she is collecting, allow us the indulgence of telling you about the last time we were on line at Barnes and Noble.  Despite the fact that this mother was purchasing her three (three!) brand new books, upon seeing the membership applications at the register mini abandoned all good feelings toward the books and exclaimed "pamphlets!"  She promptly grabbed one, handed it to her mother, and said "Here, Mama, another pamphlet for us to keep for my collection" and grinned.

However, as we're told nature has a way of working things out and that children do have survival instincts, we're sure that the famous pamphlet phase will be followed by the next common phase of childhood: 

urban dwelling syndrome (noun): the sudden realization of just how shockingly small your apartment really is, and how few things you'll actually be able to fit inside.

Sorry, kid, if you want another red then something's got to go

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