Wouldn't Be Prudent

Last weekend, we went to one of those pop up stores to get a Halloween costume that mini will wear for five minutes before taking it off and declaring it itchy as she collects candy she can't eat from houses that scare her.

Forgetting for a minute why we would do this (she asked, really!) what shocked us the most was what's out there for kids' costumes now.  Especially the girls.  Everything is, like...sexy.  Really sexy.  As in totally inappropriate for a 6 year old, 10 year old, or 12 year old sexy. 

Why does a superhero or fictional character need to have a skirt six inches above the knees?  Is that really necessary?

Now, before you go all judgmental and tell this mother to lighten up, you should know one very important fact: we are cool.  Quite cool, if we may say so.  We wear jeans and blue nail polish to work.  So we know if we're thinking this we're not the only ones.  And we were grateful when our friends at the Mouthy Housewives beat us to the punch on this particular observation, saying it better than we could have ourselves.

So read, enjoy, and cover up your girls for a little while longer.  In the meantime, we'll be busy petitioning the NYC taxi commission so that our children no longer have to be subjected to riding in cars advertising strip clubs. 

Halloween For Neurotics

This one is for all you parents who were guilty of "going there" at any point in your head tonight.

Ah, Halloween. Candy, and smiles. Costumes and trick-o-treaters. But - uh oh. With candy comes evil ingredients and recalls. With costumes come disguises and thiefs.

Hmmm. It's all good until you start thinking too much:

In a friend's lobby:

Oh look! How cute - it's SpongeBob! Someone's parent went all out. Wait a minute, there's no kid with him....he's just walking around by himself taking pictures with all the kids in the lobby....can someone say "Pedophile"! Walk away, slowly, slowly....

While walking around the neighborhood:

Hey, that building is having a party in the lobby for the little kids! How cute! They even have a clown making balloon animals. Our building should do that next year. Maybe I'll organize it.....Oh, wait. Clowns are creepy. Hmmm.

And now, we refer you back to the SpongeBob sentiment.

While Trick-or-treating in our building:

Ok - Nestle crunch, ok to put in bucket, yellow M&Ms - no. "Take the blue one", "Take the red one..", yikes all I want to do is make sure mini is not putting something overtly peanut (i.e. Reeses, Snickers) into her bucket. Even though she's not eating anything in her bucket. I know, I know....but who knew a little orange square could be so scary?

In truth, we had a great Halloween. Mini understood the concept for the first time ever and had a blast. We trick-or-treated, hung out with our neighbors and brought treats to friends. The best part of not being able to eat your candy? Giving it away at the end of the night. Fun, plus a bonus good deed. Not such a bad lot.

Lose the Hat or Forego the Milk Duds

"Trick or treat"! What does that mean, exactly? Do a search on the web and you'll come up with many different definitions. Though it depends on the country you live in, for American peeps it means the following:

Trick or Treat, also known as Guising, is an activity for children on Hallowe'en, in which they are dressed up in costumes, often of supposedly malevolent supernatural beings such as ghosts, demons, or witches, and proceed from house to house, asking for sweets with the phrase "trick-or-treat?" with the implied threat that, if their demands for confectionery are not met, they will perform some "trickery".*

Now, what's not to like about Halloween? Dressing up. Candy. Parties. It's all good. But there's one aspect of Halloween that's always bothered us: parents who dress up.

We're not talking about adults going to parties, parades or celebrations where other adults are in costume. This is acceptable with grownups- only when alcohol is served.

We're talking about the parents who go around trick-or-treating with their kids in full costume. I mean really, how, in anyone's mind, is this a good idea? It's great to go with your kids. Be there with them and enjoy the night. That's all you need to do. Now, maybe your kids liked your costumes when they were little. But at some point the kids get old enough to look around and realize that Bernie there, down the street, his mom never dresses up. And in school, Lily's mom never dresses up. And the dad next door has never dressed up...

At what point do they realize it's just kids in costume and look at you in confusion? And if your rationale is trying to make memories, does anyone's fondest Halloween memories ever really involve their mom's rendition of Bunnicula?

Now, in Poker Chick's house, the response to this embarrassing sight is withholding candy. You see, when we opened a door expecting children in costume and also got a grownup in full witches' attire and a painted white face with blood streaks, we'd already been tricked. And horrifically so, might we add. So the "trick or treat" decision was already made. No treat for the grownup. Just a mean trick they played on us. Despite what these people thought, it crossed the line from cool to creepy.

This is of course one opinion. Some grownups clearly support the action of dressing up with your kids, or this would not be the national epidemic that it has become. But something tells us that if you've read this blog before and actually enjoy it, you're not one of those people.

So this Halloween, help us get out this plea to our fellow parental peeps. Please no costumes. If you feel you must, stick the bunny ears in your pocket and put them on only to answer the door.

Or, at the very least, bring a flask with you.

*Quote from the explanation guide here, which according to Poker Chick explains it best

Happy "International Talk Like a Pirate Day"

Ahoy! The wee lass has declared she is once again going to be a pirate on Halloween. We ain't lyin', she did it all on her own. Out of the blue. Poker Chick is most pleased.

But now for the real story, lads and lasses. T'reporrrrrrt on her other post, Poker Chick is happy to tell ya that it would appear the booty was intended to be so free. She received several follow up emails. One, a notification of shipment ho! Another, a notification of a few back-ordered items with a sincere apology. Then two more. One, a giant coupon off future loot. And another, a jolly celebration of "International Talk Like a Pirate Day," (no, really, it's real), claiming a lucky few ordering today will have their order comped. So they really do this stuff, do they? Randomly comp orders?

Shiver me timbers!! Methinks me conscience is now clear.

Well, we'll still drop off 5 giant bags of clothes and shoes to Goodwill this weekend. You know, karma and all. That's karrrrrrma to you.