Bizarre Travel, Part Two

Though there's no way it can live up to the hype after all this time, here is Part two of the travel story. Click here to read Part One.

We know the current state of airline travel in the U.S. is poor. But there's delays and there's bad luck. And then there's traveling with Poker Chick. If you've read her stories in the past, or even just Part one of this series, we think you'll agree she's surpassed bad luck here. We don't know what that's called, but it definitely warrants its own category. If she were in Vegas there'd be odds on this. We're sure of it.

The flight home was a bit stressful. Poker Chick had a family emergency and was deciding whether or not to take a redeye home. But she stuck with her plans as she was flying with an old and close friend. Ironically, her friend (who was going to a wedding), could not sleep and wanted to go standby on an earlier flight. But she passed so she could fly with Poker Chick. Poor thing did not know what she was in for (we love you wegray!)

It started out innocently enough. Left the gate on time. Taxied a bit. Captain got on and told evereyone there would be the usual La Guardia traffic delay but that they'd make up the time. And then...the plane stopped moving. No big deal, maintenance issue. A small one, captain was just going back to the gate to get a new part and he knew exactly what it was. Poker Chick looked around the half-empty plane and had a feeling this was not good.

Not surprisingly, the part was either not produced or just completely falsified. Either way, all got booted from the plane. They tried to get on the next flight standby. No such luck. A while later, the airline found a new plane. That plane finally left the gate and took off. About 2 1/2 hours after scheduled take off time.


Lessons learned for any peeps reading:

1. Don't check luggage (in case you haven't learned that already)
2. Bring snacks. Because even with a 2 1/2 hour delay, a half hour for boarding and 5 hour flight they still won't feed you.
3. Bring extra underwear. You never know when you might unexpectedly take a detour for a couple of days.

The husband debuts his wee mee form.

Family Detour

Note: A couple of days until we post Part Two of the crazy travel week. We promise. Meantime, please to enjoy this sap-fest...

Emily's post had Poker Chick all sentimental and reminded her she had wanted to recount a moment to her own family (hint: family, this means you actually need to read this once in a while!). The other day, she and the mini were going through old pictures. This is a rare event, as anyone who knows Poker Chick is probably shocked she even knows where her pictures are.

At some point the mini found a picture of Poker Chick as a baby, maybe at 2 years old or so. She appeared to be whining and struggling to get out of her stroller. How appropriate. Anyway, the mini saw it and exclaimed "that's me!". Poker Chick jumped up too, because my g-d the kid was right. Had Poker Chick not been able to tell what year the photo was taken, it could easily have been mistaken for a photo of the mini. But what really amazed her was when she realized just how emotionally intelligent children can be.

The Mini: "Are you sad, Mommy?"
PC: "Yes, sweetheart, Mommy's sad".
Mini: "Why are you sad?"
PC: "Because I miss my Mommy".
Mini (throwing her arms around PC in a big hug): "Don't be sad, Mommy! You have me now."

Damn, that kid is smart.

Technical Dificulties...

Poker Chick had to take an unexpected detour to Philadelphia, so she has not yet returned from her travels. We apologize for this temporary lack of blogging and promise to return soon. Our team of experts suggest cupcakes or ice cream if you are suffering from Poker Chick withdrawal.

Bizarre Travel, Part One

In case this is not obvious, this is part one of a two-part serious. The second part will come at the end of the trip, in case that is not obvious as well.

Poker Chick's on the road again, this time cutting her weekend short to travel. She was sick all weekend which always makes flying more interesting (note to other travelers: Airborne may be a taboo subject these days, but Emergen-C seriously does make you feel better pretty quickly!)

She checks in and proceeds to walk what seems like three miles to her gate. She's tired with the usual security drill. Take off coat, take off shoes, take off sweater around your waist. Take out computer, put two bags on track, take out your "potions". Poker Chick always hates this part because you have about one minute to do all this before people start yelling at you for holding up the line. You know what, peeps? It's impossible to do that fast. People need to chill.

She's putting her shoes back on when some security lady yells at her to take all her stuff away from the belt and get together there. Great, lady. Except she's traveling alone and with no hands free to carry her shoes she needs to put them on before picking everything else up and moving. Do people not understand this? It's important to note Poker Chick did not say this out loud, merely said she was doing her best and would move shortly. She said it quite nicely.

Now here's where it gets interesting. Poker Chick walks over to get together the rest of her stuff and gets pulled aside by "behavioral interrogators". Did you know these existed? Poker Chick did not. Apparently they observe people in security and pull out potential threats for special examination. So if you're carrying a big backpack around your waist and looking like a nervous would-be terrorist, they're suspicious. This "interrogator" was the same guy who was watching people in line before security, making jokes and witty comments which people (including yours truly) were bantering back to (is that english)?

It didn't help that Poker Chick thought they were joking at first. Seriously, she's never heard of these, but it is somewhat comforting to know our security is more comprehensive than we think. At some point she realized this was no joke and looked at the man and said "wow, you're actually serious?!" Unbelievable. In case you think Poker Chick exaggerates, you can read about "Behavior Detection Officers" here. Did anyone else know about these people?

We all know Poker Chick has a tendency to put her foot in her mouth. But this time, honestly, peeps, she has no idea what wrong answer landed her there.

Now back at the plane, we'll save you the long story and give you the short one: two hours after taxi-ing away from the gate the plane was back at the gate. Emergency vehicles surrounded the plane to help an alleged sick flight attendant and get a new one on board. At the same time, they boarded extra passengers. Hmmm......