Occupy Pregnancy Street

We're so focused on our election we've missed the threats against women's rights across the globe lately, so we thought we'd help point them out.

What do women have in common with barnyard animals? Read on to find out.

Imagine for a moment a third-world country far far away where women have no rights.  If a woman is raped and wants an abortion, she is forced to carry that child to term.  If a woman is carrying a child that will be stillborn, she must suffer through the remainder of her pregnancy and put her body (and the mother of her children's body) at risk because the country won't support an abortion because of its fundamentalist regime.

Sounds bad, right?

Now, see if you can guess where this is:

Imagine if that same country said "No, no!" "We're progressive, really!  Women can get abortions.  First, they need to go through counseling and answer a million personal questions.  Then they must undergo an invasive ultrasound, even if they don't want one.  At that point, they can make their decision."  Of course, if they still want to proceed with terminating the pregnancy, they'll be subjected to repeated judgment as medical professionals show them ultrasound pictures and force them to listen to a heartbeat saying things like "Look at your baby! There it is! Listen to the heartbeat! You really still want to proceed?" And if the answer is yes,  then of course you have the right to say that, you just need to talk to two or three more other professionals who will all give you guilt trips and then force you to go home and think about it for at least 24 hours and then, if you still want it 'sign here' about umpteen times, assuming of course you haven't shrunk to the size of a pea by the judgment you've endured.

To be fair, there are exceptions for extreme cases, such as women that are victims of rape or when the fetuses will be stillborn and/or endanger the health of the mother.  Oh wait, no exceptions for those? Sorry about that, peeps.  Almost let them off the hook a bit.

Have you guessed the country yet? No?  Let's look at some statistics.

"But Poker Chick", you say, "that's the U.S.A.! What facts are relevant to this post?"

Surprise!  It's all the USA.  While you were distracted by the how-much-money-does-Romney-really-have debate or the which-wife-is-Newt-on game, millions of women in our country are having their reproductive rights taken away, piece by piece. 

We watch in admiration as citizens in nations around the world are speaking up for their rights and overthrowing totalitarian regimes in unprecedented numbers, yet we take for granted that we have complete freedom here.

Democracy is a team sport yet we've become complacent.  So in case you haven't been following this in detail, here's a half-ass roundup of some news lately, news from a country that is a role model of democracy everywhere. 

Last week, the Georgia State legislature debated a bill in the House that would make it necessary for a woman to carry a stillborn baby until she ‘naturally’ goes into labor.  Yes indeed, HB 954 makes it illegal to obtain an abortion after 20 weeks even if the woman is known to be carrying a stillborn fetus or the baby is otherwise not expected to live to term.  You can see the rationale of Georgia's esteemed leaders here:




Pennsylvania recently introduced a bill that will force women to go through personal procedures and medical guilt trips before they can make any decisions regarding their care.  Also very recently Virginia actually passed such a law, and it was the seventh state to pass a law requiring women to undergo invasive ultrasounds if they want an abortion.

There's so much more to read.  States with "let women die" bills, states criminalizing acts women do while pregnant that would otherwise be lesser offenses (or not offenses at all).  And the change in the last 10 years has been staggering.   How does it compute that in the last few years of the technological revolution our country has simultaneously experienced a seemingly backwards phenomenon where "religious" values are infiltrating our government.  Is this the "moral" reaction to the digital revolution?

Democratic, objective and free?  Or religious, dictatorial and puritanical?  It's a continuum peeps, but you can't assume you'll stay where you are.  Just like with relationships, if we continue to take our freedoms for granted, maybe someday they won't be there anymore.

Maybe it's time to take the "Occupy" movement a step further.  We have more problems than we think.

Yes, Some People Really Are This Ignorant...

A great way to respond to this ignorant comment...

(Thanks to Tiffany for creating this cartoon!)

Not MIA.

More coming soon. We swear.

I Don't Write Anymore, But....

I have not blogged in forever.  Sorry, peeps.  Reality of single motherhood, an unexpected roommate (more on that another time), and a bad case of bronchitis has sort of put a crimp in our writing time.  But lucky for you we have not one, but two awesome friends who have each "arrived" in their own way.  Also, they're kick-ass peeps.  So there's that.

Emily writes about the challenges of raising boys and girls to be themselves while trying to buck gender norms at the same time.  We've always had a link to her blog here, love her writing, and today's piece was in the New York Times.  The Times, peeps!

Lani has her debut post out in a local NY magazine site.  It's about the humor of being a parent, so we're sure even our non-NY readers will relate.  Plus, newbies need encouragement.

Please check out their work and join the other mothers commenting discussion!
 

Step away from the cheese, peeps.

This message will always be true, peeps.

Ahhh, Valentine's Day.   You're expecting some sort of snarky post, aren't you?  Well, surprise! If you've got a hankering for some classic Poker Chick, you can read our favorite Valentine's Day post circa 2007.  Cracks us up, every time.  No, really...read it.  Please?





This year we're bypassing the usual cynicism; partly because we'll never be able to top our favorite post from 2007, and partly because this year we seem to have unearthed some hidden *gasp* optimism.

You see, this Valentine's day, things are different.  Poker husband moved out a while ago, though we can't legally call him that anymore.  We're checking that "other" box on forms now.  While we're no experts on this subject, based on what we've seen in the movies and pop culture (which must be true, right?) the usual pattern is this: big fight - maybe even violent, someone yells sweet nothings such as "they're how old?!" or "your secretary, how could you!", someone moves out and overpays for a tiny hotel room, everyone is notified immediately, the lawyers are summoned, someone starts dating too soon, one wants the other one back but they're not interested, then they decide they do want them back and the other is now sleeping with their best friend, lots of drama, families involved, no one speaking to each other, yadda...yadda... yadda...

That's how it works, right?  Oh, not quite? Interesting.

So that wasn't the case here either.  Just a plain old boring case of two good people trying to be good parents and struggling to do the right thing and be [mostly] mature about it.  For mini's sake, that's all we're going to say about that. 

Which brings us back to Valentine's Day, clearly!  You'd think that our first Feb 14th as a single mother would bring us down.  But we're determined to create a happy home with some new traditions, and somehow Valentine's Day has us thinking about the people we love, and the people who have supported us, and we can't help but feel this wonderful appreciation for those loyal friends and family who were there for us.  And so we had a sudden urge to buy mini a card, which we didn't understand.  And then we had a sudden urge for chocolate, which we did understand.

And then we had this epiphany that we didn't actually hate Valentine's Day.  We still hate the cheese and chintz, but the concept? Not as much.  We realized that we were trained to hate Valentine's Day:  Jews don't celebrate it.  It makes people feel lonely and left out.  Mom was diagnosed with an inhuman fatal illness that day.  You know, the usual excuses.

While those were all very, very good reasons to hate this day indeed, it finally occurred to us that those were other people's reasons, not ours.  We actually don't have a reason to hate it ourselves.  So this year we're trying love and a couple of cards on for size. 

Ahh, anti-Valentines...

we will always love you so

But don't even try to come near us with those candy heart things or we'll barf all over you.  Just sayin'.  Love and optimism aside, it's still horribly offensive.  Cheese is still cheese peeps, no matter how you slice it.  You can quote us on that one.