F*cked by the F-Girl, Again!

Her name was Florence. She was hot and heavy. But also dark and stormy. So stormy, in fact, she shut down and airport and left 120 people (Poker Chick included) stranded in Bermuda. Not that it's a bad place to be stranded. But if you're going to spend the money to go to Bermuda (and it is a lot), you want to be able to see that pink sand. So a hurricane kinda puts a damper on that. But Poker Chick figured Florence was a once-in-a-lifetime kinda thing.

Fast forward two years later. (It can't be one year, because the F-name is male the year in between). Turns out Faye's got it in for Poker Chick, too. We figured we were safe because Faye was done and far west of the Atlantic. But of course then Poker Chick tried to plan a beach vacation. So against all odds, Faye gathered all "remnants" and moved herself back east to visit. And thus another beach vacation is rained out. To illustrate, behold the OBX weather patterns below:

Weather for most of the week

The "nice" day this week

Weather other people get here

Poker Chick is thinking perhaps she should only plan beach vacations in odd-numbered years.

Thanks a lot, bitches.

Corolla is not just a Toyota

Corolla is also a remote place on the Outer Banks of North Carolina. So remote, in fact, that it does not get blackberry service. In case you were wondering, Corolla is here:
<-That's Corolla. Waaay out in the middle of nowhere.
To give you some scale, the bridge to OBX is in Kitty Hawk, so we had to go another 20-30 miles to get away from civilization. The closest "big" town to us is to the south, called Duck. There are several advantages to this:

1) It's easy to remember if you get lost. "The one above the duck!"
2) Everything sounds funnier when added to "duck". "Duck donuts". "Duck fudge". "Duck Smoothies". It's hilarious! Especially when "duck donuts" are "made to order".

Now, some of you must be wondering how our city girl is faring in these parts. Well, the snob within is truly slumming it, peeps. Let her paint you a picture:

• She's living in a house. Not the Four Seasons, not a resort house with maid service and a restaurant, but a regular not-so-fancy teal-green house.
  
• For the most part, it feels like a cross between the Jersey shore and the Hamptons. So far, the only big advantage she's been able to identify is warmer water. Just like the NY/NJ beaches, there's kitchsy stores and farmers markets and fudge and mini-golf. And the plethora of bbq (pigs in pits) is...hmmm...maybe a little more...country.
• Speaking of country, there's wild horses running around these parts.
• And beer "drive-thrus". That's right, beer. Drive-through. They're called "Brew-Thrus".
  

Now, lest you think she's complaining, she must add that the house has a pool and hot tub. And having a stocked fridge is.. (gasp)...not so bad. She didn't cook or anything but she did make a turkey sandwich. With sides of grapes and carrot sticks. It may be more fruit and veggies than she's eaten in weeks. Also, the beach and sun are gorgeous. As a result, after just one day, she is brown and luscious. And the kids had fun too. This is good because apparently Hurricane Faye left behind some remnants that are headed back east and will ruin the rest of the stay with rain and clouds all the time. Lovely.

Tomorrow we'll post about amusing signs way. There are some you peeps will not believe. Meanwhile, good trip or not good trip? We'll leave readers to their own opinions for now. Feel free to share.

She bought an itsy bitsy teeny weeny orange polka dot bikini...

We know Poker Chick's unique "sloppy chic" style (name invented by UK) makes her vehemently anti-polka dot.  Still, it was cute.  And after trying tons on, to have just one look halfway decent was an immediate "buy".  Any mother will understand this.  Heck, any woman will understand this.

Poker Chick doesn't really have anything to add.  Really, she just couldn't pass up an opportunity to create a post with the above title.