Five Reasons to Celebrate Thanksgiving Abroad

As some of you know, this year we decided to have ourselves a little adventure this Thanksgiving. We like to call it the Great Thanksgivingukkah, Catalonia-style.

Many people drive for hours to see their family, or brave the airports to get stuck at snow-filled connections, just to see their family for a few hours.  This is, as many like to say, par for the course.

Thus, we decided what's a few hours of flying? It was time to celebrate the holiday outside the country!!!  Close your eyes, nap for a few hours and then.....hola, Barcelona!  See how easy that was?

Now, we knew Thanksgiving outside of the U.S. would have its benefits, but in hindsight they were even greater than anticipated.  So behold, our top 5 reasons to leave the country on Thanksgiving!

1) It's the cheapest time to see Europe.  For reals.

2) If you're visiting friends, you can still have Thanksgiving dinner!  We may have been thousands of miles away from home, but we were not without our turkey and marshmallow covered sweet potatoes.

mmm .... malvaviscos rosa y blanco

3) Better wine while you eat, and no football.  You can actually converse with the other guests without having them fall asleep on you!

4) Airports are packed with people flying within the 50 states - international flights? Not so much.  You'd never know we were flying on a holiday weekend!

5) And perhaps the best part of traveling abroad on Thanksgiving: missing Black Friday!  Instead of fighting with strangers in the name of consumerism, we spent our day visiting gorgeous architecture, taking a walking tour of a new city, learning some Spanish history, drinking fabulous coffee, and learning about fun local traditions such as Caga Tio, the Catalonian Christmas log you hit with a special Christmas stick so he poops out presents and candy.  (If you think we're making this up, read more about it here).  Strange to see a culture that brings out the squatting statuettes on the holidays.

Because we like you peeps, we'll spare you the picture of Hello Kitty and her pink turd, which means you'll have to take our word for it on this one.

Caga Tios, everywhere you look.  Every home has one.

A big thank you to our hostess with the mostess

So there you have it.  If you ever get a chance to have yourself a little Thanksgiving adventure outside of the U.S., take it! And unlike this year, you won't have to worry about what to do about Chanukah either.  Though if you do, get thee some Southeast Asian cauliflower/zucchini fritters, which taste just like the real thing. You heard it here first.

Sometimes the only way to describe a trip is to show the signs

We'll start with food. Sadly, the camera ran out of battery power before we could photograph the dutch apple pie. That's a damn shame.

Mmmmm.....Dutch curry. Appel Sap. Fries.

Later are the signs that made Poker Chick laugh out loud, by herself, in public. Embarrassing, yes. But funny!

The last sign on this page had Poker Chick sh*tting bricks. It took her a while, but she finally figured out that "vertraag"means "delayed". The "vertraag" ended up being over 25 minutes, which meant yours truly was running like a fiend to make her plane when she finally got to the airport. It might have been easier if they said it was "late" instead. That one would just be "laat".

Jews, they're just like us

The funny thing about Israel is that everyone looks familiar. Not that it's not a diverse country, it is - you see every skin color and then some and once you get past the weirdness of an asian woman opening her mouth and speaking hebrew it's cool.

But still, take a look at all the white people and they all look like someone you know. Keep looking and after a while you realize it's because where the majority of the white population is Jewish. And if you believe the statistics, one of every six (or four, depending who you read) of these people is related to you or your Aunt Sadie.

For those of you (that would be everyone) used to being a minority population in your country, this concept is a bit mind-boggling when you stop to think about it. A whole country when even the most secular of people refers to their Saturday night parties as those on "motzei Shabbat". It's pretty freakin' awesome.


Now let's talk about the beach. For the geographically challenged, Israel sits on the eastern shore of the Mediterranean. Here are some fun facts, with some help from Wikipedia. First, you should know that large islands in the Mediterranean include Cyprus, Crete, Euboea, Rhodes, Lesbos, Chios, Kefalonia and Corfu in the eastern Mediterranean; Sardinia, Corsica, Sicily, and Malta in the central Mediterranean; and Ibiza, Majorca and Minorca in the western Mediterranean.

1. The Mediterranean climate is generally one of wet, cold winters and hot, dry summers. Crops of the region include olives, grapes, oranges, tangerines, and cork. A souvenir gift for the first person who can tell Poker Chick what a "cork" crop is.
2. Being nearly landlocked affects the Mediterranean Sea's properties; for instance, tides are very limited as a result of the narrow connection with the Atlantic Ocean.
3. The Mediterranean is characterized and immediately recognized by its deep blue color. Behold, a picture of the blue sea wherever we can put it near this text. Regrettably, the good ones are still in the camera. Yeah, uh, that's the story.
4. Evaporation is especially high in its eastern half, causing the water level to decrease and salinity to increase eastward. This makes sense to Poker Chick, as she can tell you it's a salty sea. You can smell it in the air from three blocks aways.

If Poker Chick had more than 2/3 of one (out of three total) battery packs left on her camera, she'd show you the funny splotchy sunburn on her foot. Like a splash of burn. But she can't so you'll have to imagine it.

The funny thing about the beach is that it's almost impossible to find an American these days there anymore. It's all Europeans - a lot of Brits and French, a smattering of Germans, Spanish and others. Americans are not so much loved in this (or any) part of the world, and Poker Chick has never seen it in full force like this.

Now, to answer the first question, why are there no Americans? Because in case you hadn't noticed the dollar is in the toilet, peeps. Fellow ad friends have seen the effects as the tried and true international shoot is slowly becoming a thing of the past. Fashion friends can no longer afford such luxuries as Prada and Louis Vuitton. International friends obviously had this realization before yours truly.

But it's true. Look at everyone else in their Dior sunglasses, and you realize.....we've become poor! And the rest of the world is becoming richer as we obliviously watch clips like "The cutest puppies in America" on "morning news" programs. Know what you get when you turn on the news here? Take a guess, c'mon. That's right! It's......REAL news! Imagine that. Now imagine all the people 'round the world pitying us ignorant Americans as we eat our McDonald's and pet our pooches.

Poker Chick is by no means unpatriotic, but it is......embarrassing. We need to get our act together and wake up and realize the world is much bigger than we are and the days of the American empire are over. Thanks, G.W. Swell job.

Loyal readers should stay tuned for more. Coming up.....tales of Jerusalem and the yuppification of Tel Aviv.

See if you can find what's similar

'Twas around rush hour when Poker Chick took the commuter train to Centraal Station in downtown Amsterdam the other day. For you New Yorkers out there, here are a few pics. It's hard, but see if you can spot the similarities:

What would you do if I sang out of tune....

So now we come to Amsterdam. Land of legal prostitutes and free pot. Oh yeah, and tulips, clogs and cheese. Right. Cheese.

If you look closely, you will see in the white that this building was erected in the year 1345. Turns out this was the year of the great miracle of Amsterdam. We won't go into it, but the miracle involves a con artist and some fireproof bread.

The other day a gentleman asked Poker Chick what the difference was between Amsterdam and Rotterdam. Aside from the obvious answer, turns out Rotterdam is totally modern in comparison. Why? Because it was leveled during WWII while Amsterdam remained relatively unscathed. So Rotterdam rebuilt in the 20th century whilst in Amsterdam there are loads of buildings around for almost 1,000 years. In fact, there seems to be some law there where if you fix up a place you have to retain the integrity of the facade. So everything stays looking old. Or "charming" as realtors in the States would say.

Amsterdam was a trip. Tons of tourists, mostly from England and Australia. Couple of Americans, though not many. One thing Poker Chick did that she highly recommends was a free walking tour. It sounds cheesy, but these people make it cool and therefore their clientele is cool as well. They tell you neat facts, like the history behind those funny metal things in random street corners. Turns out, they punish junkies who want to piss in corners by repelling it back and in some evil cases even electrocuting them. That's Dutch initiative for you. Poker Chick sends a shout out to Basilio, for being the most awesomest tour guide. We also send a shout out to our new friend Clare, who is blonde and Australian and swears she's never heard of the show Lost. Surely, you lie! You were J.J. Abrams' secret lover, weren't you? Admit it! Okay. Maybe not. You're still cool.

Now let's talk about food. Highlights of the day: amazing chocolate croissant. Coffee (it's so damn good abroad). Yogurt smoothie. Fries with mayo. We got a beautiful picture of some waffles but we'll have to wait to actually eat some on the way back. Can't eat it all in one day.

The canals are truly beautiful. Poker Chick's never been to Venice, but this is the closest she's come. Seing houses come out of the water is neato.

Most surprising? The sun was strong. Real strong.

Finally, we're back to vanity. PC was most pleased with her choice of frayed all-stars for her traveling feet. They seem to be the hip shoes in several countries, Netherlands included. Or, as the Dutch say it, Neyderlunds.

Stay tuned for more......

Day 1, hour who knows.....

Well technically it's been only 42 hours or so since taking off from New York, which makes this the longest day ever. What has Poker Chick gotten herself into since take off?

Well since Big Boy is not good at sharing his computer, she'll share her notes and write more when he's asleep. But suffice it so say there's lots to share.

Thursday night- take off
Poker Chick is a woman who likes her stuff. She's always needed the security of carrying a big bag at all times, knowing she has her meds, band aids, makeup, new clothes, whatever, ready at her finger tips. It helps her relax. Being a seasoned traveler she also is used to carrying as much on board as possible. It's just safer.

So now we take a girl always used to a big purse, we take away her carry on baggage, and we replace it all with a backpack. That's it. Her jeans, sneakers, a sweater thrown over her tshirt, and a backpack on her back. For the next two days. She didn't even realize how little she had on her until she watched the suitcase go away in terror. Then it hit her at security. She only needed one bin to go through the metal detector. Phone, shoes, sweater, it all fit in one bin. Security had never been so easy in her life.

It was such an unsettling feeling, knowing she was hedging her bets, not carrying the world so as to be prepared for every possible scenario.

Definitely the right way to start an adventure.

Next post, Amsterdam, part 1. Until then, please to enjoy thoughts scribbled into Poker Chick's notebook. All copied without edits.

• Who is this obnoxious load guy near me?
• I can't believe Cereality closed before I had time to get some. Of course.
• I ordered the veggie meal? Really? Uh, oookay then.
• Seriously, who is this guy! I think he's the boss of these two women speaking next to me. They're speaking Spanish to each other. He's yelling at them in Dutch. Then muttering to himself in German. Who are these people? And how many languages do they speak? And do they not believe in sleep where they come from?
• Well, did my best. Slept a bit and just downed a bottle of water mixed with EmergenC. Maybe it'll wake my ass up!!! Next, to change. Need to make an attempt to look like a human being and not a walking zombie with unwashed hair, morning breath, and a giant pimple that seems to have sprouted in the last two hours. Great. I wanted to look young, but pimply-faced American teenager was not the look I was going for. Better put the nicer shirt on. Now repeat after me, "it is not 3am it is 9am, it is not 3am, it is not 3am...."

Friday

• OK, what's with the bathrooms in Holland? Are they all unisex or something?

To be continued.....with pictures....

Are You Ready For The Ugly American?

Well, it's time for Poker Chick to take her misadventures out of New York and into the open world. Thursday starts the week-long trip to the Netherlands and Israel!!

Poker Chick will post as often as possible, so ye who want updates, stay tuned....