Sunday, January 27, 2013

W.E.S.

Don't hate us! It's just a W.E.S.
There is an expression some peeps we know invented called "W.E.S." which is short for "Weakened Emotional State".  Quite a clever acronym actually, as no self-respecting male (or female, for that matter) wants to admit they've been rendered into a blubbering fool, obsessing over what's eating at them, dragging themselves through their days and spending whole nights on the bathroom floor.

So in the case of these particular peeps it allowed some guys to let each other know they needed a little extra attention in a way that wasn't emasculating.

Picture a typical scenario where Thing 1 might be trying to get the last beer, but Thing 2 saw him coming and beat him to it.

"Nice try dude, next time be faster"

Thing 1 sits down with a heavy expression and stares ahead at nothing.

"Dude. W.E.S."

Thing 2 quietly hands over the beer.

"Oh yeah, I forgot.  Say no more"

This scenario works quite nicely in many other settings too.  Substitute the beer for the last piece of cake, or the bigger half of the burger, the hot Swedish girl you just picked up in a bar....you see where this is going.

But most importantly, it reminds friends not to forget you.

"Let's call J-dog to join, he's in a W.E.S."

That said, we can imagine its implications beyond your immediate circle of friends....

"I'm so sorry I ripped off all your eyebrows.  I'm in a W.E.S., see....."

or

"Turtle abuse!? I would never abuse a reptile!  It's just a W.E.S...."

or

"Where are my pants!? Oh my goodness, W.E.S. has caused me to fall victim to wearing tights as pants...!"

It could even go so far as being an official police cause of crime.

"Yeah, I got a big car accident here.  Nope, no foul play here, just a bad case of W.E.S."

Yes this could be huge.  W.E.S. is a veritable trump card, a sort of "get out of jail free" card for friends to get a pass on being teased for a while.

Too bad our children haven't discovered it, as it sure would help decipher those times when you're not sure if they're just misbehaving/oppositional/defiant or if something really upset them.  Wouldn't it be nice if instead of wondering if you should or shouldn't be punishing them, they could just honestly tell you "It's not me, momma.  I'm in a W.E.S."

It's only a matter of time, peeps.  W.E.S.  You heard it here first.